God's Mistakes

On the presumption that the universe must have a first cause, the latest fad in religious apologetics is the argument that the universe is so exceedingly complex that it could only come from the mind of a super intelligent being, namely God. Underlying this argument is the second presumption that the Bible is the word of the same God that created the universe.

Certainly the universe is awesome. But I'm going to bypass trying to explain the nature of existence because it is unexplainable. The God argument doesn't explain how God came into existence. To say that God always existed doesn't explain how God could exist in a universe that didn't exist. For all we know the universe always existed beyond bounds that can't be seen.

Rather than go in circles let's turn our attention to the second presumption that the biblical God created the universe. If there is such thing as a super intelligent God then we should see some evidence of it in the Bible. The short answer is that the biblical God turns out to be ignorant and stupid. What follows are the reasons why:

1.  When the biblical God said he created the recognizable universe in six days he was off by at least twelve billion years.

2. No sooner did God create his perfect Eden when along came a talking snake who outwitted him. His design failed from the get-go.

3. The second generation produced a murderer, Cain. For his misdeed God put a protective mark on Cain's head that made him rich and famous.

4. As time passed, things got so bad that he decided to flood the world and start over. He chose Noah and his family as the most righteous people in the world thinking that they would produce righteous progeny.

5. The people in Sodom and Gomorrah proved him wrong. So he destroyed the city.

6. He offered Abraham a deal to make his offspring the most powerful people in the world. Things went well with Abraham's offspring, Isaac and Jacob until he made a great famine that forced Jacob and his children to migrate to Egypt. Within 400 years Jacob's descendants were pressed into slavery. Oops, he goofed again.

7. So he chose Moses to take the Israelites to the Promised Land. No sooner were the people free from Egyptian slavery when Moses proved to be even more oppressive. When the people rebelled, God made them wander in the desert for forty years until a new generation was of age. Even Moses was not allowed to set foot in the Promised Land.

8. Feeling strong, God helped Joshua murder and pillage the original occupants of the Promised Land. But glory days didn't last long. After Joshua, the period of Judges had mixed success that ended in a war between the tribes.

9. The people wanted a king. So God had Samuel anoint Saul as the first king. Saul lasted about twenty years until he went astray. So God had him commit suicide and told Samuel to replace him with David. With David and Solomon, the tiny nation of Israel prospered. But contrary to his promise to Abraham, Israel was surrounded by more powerful neighbors.

10. Under Solomon's successor, Rehoboam, the people complained about their forced labor. Rehoboam responded with more oppression. So there was a civil war and Israel split into two kingdoms, Israel and Judah. God's dream fell apart.

11. Poor God, he couldn't get respect. The people of Israel couldn't please him to he handed them over to the Assyrians. The people of Judah disappointed him, so he gave them to the Babylonians. It didn't pay to be God's chosen.

12. Finally, his fury got so intense that he murdered his son, Jesus. And to this day he hasn't stopped blaming man for his mistakes.

In conclusion, there is no way to reconcile the existence of a God who created the universe with the bumbling God in the Bible. Only men could have created such a creature.